YEAH YOU HEARD THAT. THE SINGLE GREATEST SPOKESPERSON EVER TO HAVE WALKED THIS GOOD GREEN EARTH WAS THE THIRD VICTIM OF HOLLYWOOD'S KIRA. OUT SOUL PROVIDER OF OXYCLEAN, ORANGEGLOW, AND MIGHTY PUTTY. I DON'T ABOUT THE LIKES OF YOU, BUT TO ME, HE WAS A HERO. A HERO WHO WOULD PROUDLY SCREAM AT THE ELDERLY IN THEIR OWN LIVING ROOM. A HERO WHO COULD SELL SHOES TO THE LEGLESS, AND LEGS TO THE SHOELESS. HE WAS A HERO...AND HEROES CANNOT BE KILLED. HEROES ARE REMADE.
THERE IS ONLY ONE SOLUTION.
VINCE, IF YOU'RE OUT THERE. GRAB YOUR SHAMWOW AND YOUR SLAPCHOP. WE NEED YOU. YOU MUST BE THE BEACON OF HOPE. YOU MUST PROMISE US TO DOUBLE OUR ORDERS, CUT THE LEADING CONTENDERS PRICE IN HALF, AND THROW IN A SNUGGIE FOR FREE IF WE CALL IN THE NEXT 10 MINUTES.
OUR FUTURES ARE IN YOUR HANDS.
GODSPEED.
(TL;DR BILLY MAYS IS DEAD AND VINCE IS AWESOME.)
- Mood:
Sorrow